A certain Althusere said something about ideology which I’ll try and explain because everything he said can’t fit into one sentence. He basically said that ideology is a set of certain conditions that need to constantly reproduce itself and that those are ensured by ideological apparatuses.
Anyway it’s something that can be applied onto a relationship. How you might ask? Well it’s simple really. Two sides have to be happy, meaning the relationship has to be in balance in order for the relationship to function properly. If you fall out of that balance things like this described in one of my posts and selected videos happen. Now it means that if you don’t text you don’t love me, which is wrong, if you don’t call you’re breaking up, which is again wrong (These are situations typical for a couple that have got used to constant communication, or to that telepathy thing, which I think doesn’t exist, but basically means that certain actions imply certain meanings).
To go back to the ideology schtuff, once one partner does something that is not a part of the daily routine, the balance is damaged and your partner starts feeling that you are not giving your all. Explaining the situation doesn’t help, because they end up being excuses for stupid people, which can be called a repressive relationship apparatus. The one that makes you feel miserable and makes you go the way your partner wants you to go.
Luckily love is not communism, even though some describe it as a lie. Love is sharing and accepting change. It takes time to get used to changes, but that’s how it is in life. If you can’t get used to your partner changing, you should question your commitment and stop pinning everything to your partner. Or put in other words, relationship is a bitch you have to get used to it.