An argument with myself

Every day starts the same. Slow awakening ends your night’s trip to dream land. I sometimes wish it could last longer. Just few more minutes for the smile to appear on my face and start my day. Yet those five minutes never come. We tend to stay in bed longer hoping for our dream to continue, knowing that it never actually will. So did I, yesterday. But then I was five minutes late for everything else. I tried explaining the dream and I couldn’t manage that either. I guess I was caught somewhere between my wishes and my reality. not willing to give up on the wishes and not wanting to go back to the reality.

We wake up into a set of rules. We were born into a set of rules. They rarely change, almost never. That is why my mind gets stuck. I wanted to break the code, not follow the etiquette, be on my own, live by my own rules. Yet the more I struggle to break free the more I find myself restricted.

We are born into captivity. Captivity of our own wishes, desire and time. A constant that never changes its pace yet sometimes seems slower than usual and sometimes faster tha we would like it to be.

My whole day went by arguing with myself whether those five minutes made any difference. i guess they have not. My dream was over in a split second and no matter how much longer I stayed in bed it was long gone, racing off to make another dreamer wonder.

When life comes to end we will probably feel the same. “If I could only have more time” will most definitely be the sentence. Our lives are filled with questions and ifs. Enjoy answering them, in time, because once the other side comes calling you will wish it hadn’t come so early.

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